So like…..What’s Your Sign?

When your friend says aspects of your astrological chart don’t line up with aspects of your boyfriend’s astrological chart:

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I have something called Relationship OCD (rOCD).  This particular brand of OCD is barely ever talked about and there is very little research on it, but its a real thing.  rOCD is when your obsessions and compulsions center around a significant other or someone you’re dating. It can take one (or both) of two forms. On the one hand you can obsess over the other person’s flaws and the “rightness” of the relationship and on the other hand you can obsess over if they really love you or their faithfulness to you. My rOCD tends to flip a little bit between both which is confusing for my poor boyfriend.

The compulsions associated with this can be anything of course but some examples are: mentally comparing your relationship with others, “checking” your feelings to see if you feel in love (and any moment where you don’t feel totally in love is a massive trigger), or seeking constant reassurance from your partner about their feelings for you.

This is hard for me to write about because even when I tell people about my OCD I usually leave this aspect of it out. I am aware that to the untrained eye it just appears that I’m your stereotypical CRAZY girlfriend. For example, when I studied abroad in college my roommates simply did not understand why I couldn’t enjoy my time abroad because I was bombarded with nearly constant obsessive, unwanted thoughts about my boyfriend cheating on me while I was gone. He didn’t understand it either. I didn’t even understand it. It would be another 3 years (and a period of us being broken up) before I would be able to put a name to what was going on in my head.

Luckily now we both understand it better and he knows to only give me reassurance once or twice before refusing to be an enabler in my compulsions. I understand what is happening now when a friend tells me that some aspects of our astrology don’t line up and it seems like the world screeches to a halt. I understand what is happening when I can’t focus on anything around me after that. I understand what is happening when I then feel the need to spend the next week compulsively learning about astrology to make sure our relationship isn’t “wrong”. I understand what is happening and so I will not be spending my week reading about astrology, but instead use my time to do things that will move me toward positive things in my life : )

2 thoughts on “So like…..What’s Your Sign?

  1. hi there, I also suffer from ROCD. I particularly liked the last paragraph of this blog, because it is something I was going to blog about today … Anyway, thank you for sharing. Its its a tough form of OCD isn’t it!!

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